8 ways to start a mental health conversation with an adult

By Vivian Nunez

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Use these prompts to boost your confidence.

Everyone feels differently about mental health conversations; some people welcome the topic with open arms, while others can’t run away fast enough. Someone’s age doesn’t immediately mean that they will or won’t be open to talking about mental health.

As a young person —whether you’re a teen or a college student— you probably know best who in your life may be open to talking to you about your mental health. For example, maybe you’ve heard them talk about their mental health before, or maybe they’ve even made it clear that you can come to them with any struggles you may be going through. But even so, it can be difficult to know how to tell someone you’re struggling with your mental health.

Once you do know who you want to talk to, the next step is figuring out what to say. Thankfully, we’re here to make at least the beginning of your conversation a little easier. Below are some potential scenarios accompanied by mental health conversation starters to help get the ball rolling when it comes to talking to adults about your mental health.

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“I’m having a hard time sleeping.”

Conversation starter: Can you help me figure out what is wrong?

In a conversation, it can sometimes be helpful to make it clear that you’re not only looking to share a fact or story (like that you’re having a hard time sleeping) but also invite advice and support.

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“I just feel like crying all the time, and I don’t know why.”

Conversation starter: Is it normal to feel this overwhelmed?

You’re not strange for having big feelings – in fact, putting a label on how you’re feeling can be helpful in sorting things out. Starting a conversation can help you understand whether your feelings are typical for your stage of life, or if they’re crossing into overwhelm.

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“I know you don’t believe in therapy, but I think I need help.”

Conversation starter: Is there a way for you to help me find someone to talk to?

Talking about mental health openly is a new-ish conversation that some members of older generations are still getting a handle on. If you believe the only adult in your life who you can approach isn’t a big believer in mental health support, feel free to say that at the onset. You can emphasize that you respect their perspective but wonder if they can still help you find a mental health professional to talk to.

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“My friends keep saying I’m acting really different.”

Conversation starter: Do you think I’m acting different lately?

Sometimes, we all need a gut check. It’s hard to see our own changes in behavior as clearly as others may see them. Turn to an adult you trust to help better understand if your friends may be on to something.

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“I don’t know what to do when I feel so stressed out.”

Conversation starter: What do you do when you’re stressed out?

If you want guidance on better managing your stress or mental health, asking other adults how they manage their stress is a great place to start. You may find that no single person has the perfect answer; instead, gathering different perspectives may inspire you to manage your stress differently.

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“I feel really anxious all the time, and I don’t know how to make it stop.”

Conversation starter: What do I do when I have an anxiety attack?

You can start a mental health-related conversation by getting down to specifics — like times you’ve dealt with anxiety or panic attacks. Use those anecdotes as a launching pad for a bigger conversation about what to do next to keep yourself safe.
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“I don’t think I can talk to my parents about this, but I think something is wrong with mymental health.”

Conversation starter: Can you help me figure out what to do next?

As a student, you come across many adults — guidance counselors, coaches, or professors, to name a few. If your parents aren’t a go-to for mental health conversations, think about one of the more trusted adults in your life and try starting a conversation with them.

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“I’ve been feeling kind of strange lately.”

Conversation starter: How do I know if I have depression or anxiety?

Since mental health conversations are so popular for younger generations, it’s easy to come across social media content or articles that point out depression or anxiety red flags. But, if it’s your first time learning about your mental health, it can be helpful to turn to a trusted, expert source (like a mental health professional) on how to identify what you’re feeling.

No matter who you choose to start a mental health conversation with, you should feel proud of yourself for getting the help you deserve. There is no shame in struggling with your mental health or asking for help. It’s expected that you will have a lot of questions if you’re in new territory, and turning to trusted adults in your life is a great first step in answering them.

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Calm Health is not intended to diagnose or treat depression, anxiety, or any other mental or physical health condition. The use of Calm Health is not a substitute for care by a physician or other health care provider. Any questions that you may have regarding the diagnosis, care, or treatment of a health condition should be directed to your physician or health care provider. Calm Health is a mental wellness product.